Do you kick off New Year’s with a lengthy list of resolutions - or perhaps a few challenging ones - determined to take this opportunity for some serious self-improvement? Or after years of falling short with Jan. 1 goals, have you decided that a new year probably won’t lead to a new you?
Or, do you fall somewhere in between: Aware that resolution perfection is unlikely but still willing to give something a try?
I’d peg myself as somewhere in the middle. I still like the opportunity to work toward a better me, although I’m somewhat less earnest about “New Year’s resolutions” than when I was younger. But since I have the luxury of spending more time and energy on my life now without a full-time job, I don’t want to fritter that away. My first January as a retiree seems like a good opportunity to put thought and effort into some new goals.
One thing I’ve learned that doesn’t work: chastising myself with a list of things I should stop or start doing. Stop eating unhealthy processed foods! You have too much clutter! Stop being so lazy and start cooking more! I wouldn’t enjoy living with someone else who constantly admonished me about those things. It’s not any more pleasant to hear that all the time inside my own head.
Some “experts” say a key to achievable resolutions is to make them narrow and specific. For example, instead of “read more”, “read one book a month”. However, the last thing I feel like doing in this early stage of retirement is giving myself some new to-do lists.
Instead, I’ve decided to try focusing on two general goals: self care and gratitude.
By “self care,” I don’t mean going for a massage or getting my nails done – although those are lovely and worth doing! But for the purposes of goals, I mean nourishing my body and soul with the things that many of us want to do to improve our lives: eat well, manage stress more effectively, better appreciate the blessings in my life, spend more time on things that matter and less on those that don’t. And, try to get serious about both the physical and mental clutter in my life, since that makes for a less peaceful, relaxing environment. (I’m also serious about exercise, but that’s something I’ve been doing regularly for decades already).
In other words, my basic behavioral goals won’t be too much different than in past years, but I want them to come from a different place. Not “You shouldn’t be doing that! Should you be eating that?”, but “Is this something I want for myself? Am I doing this thing, spending this time, as part of how I want to live this next chapter of my life?”
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