Getting rid of work stress should make for a less stressful existence overall. And in some ways that’s been true for me – especially since I don’t have the crushing time pressure each day that I had with a full-time job.
But there’s a lot of other stress in life besides work. Challenges that come with aging, which can be substantial. Current events. Day-to-day things that don’t go the way I’d hoped. Even some normal human interactions that socially anxious introverts can magnify out of proportion.
I’m less high strung than I was during my career, but I didn’t exactly become “Don’t worry, be happy” just because my calendar’s clear of work meetings. I can still use some new tools as I embark on my Next Chapter – a period of life that involves uncertainty (we Type As detest not being in control) and some negatives as well as positives of getting older.
Which is why I signed up for a local “Mindfulness for a Peaceful Mind and Compassionate Heart” workshop. The leader, Tsering Ngodup Yodsampa, was born in Tibet, served as translator for several renowned Buddhist masters, and is a chaplain at Beth Israel Deaconess Medical Center in addition to teaching Tibetan culture and meditation.
I’ve taken meditation classes before, but those were more, as Mr. Yodsampa said, Western interpretations – typically focused on techniques to de-stress and relax and not core Buddhist philosophy.
Obviously, no one can “learn Buddhist philosophy” in four sessions. But that wasn’t the point. I felt like I got an authentic sample, and I’m glad for the exposure. I could sense Mr. Yodsampa’s “centeredness” in person in a way I’m sure I couldn’t have on a screen. I couldn’t learn that kind of inner calm in person in just four classes either, but it was still interesting to experience.
Each class was 90 minutes on Friday afternoons, and I inititally feared having to sit still and meditate for an hour or more. An hour? Eek! I tend to get fidgety after a few minutes. But sessions turned out to be a lot of talking and sharing questions and experiences, with the longest meditation sittings about 10 minutes at a time. Ten minutes is still a long time to sit still and focus on one thing, by the way, if you’re used to living in a whirlwind of your own mind. But it was doable.
One of the major “technique” differences in this class compared with others I’ve taken is that he insisted we meditate with our eyes open. The idea was to engage all our senses as we focused attention on the breath.
I found that surprisingly difficult at first, since I was used to meditating with eyes closed and so having fewer distractions. But this way should help me be more mindful in my day-to-day life, since I’m likely to need these skills in situations where closing my eyes isn’t always an option.
We also had a few lessons on the philosophical and spiritual side of Buddhism, including the concepts of compassion for self and others. Not all of it resonated with me, but some did. And that was enough to make the whole thing worthwhile.
I liked this as an early-retirement experiment. It wasn’t a long-term commitment, and I got to experience something new and then decide how much of it I might - or might not - want to incorporate into my life.
I hope to check out other in-person classes too at some point. And I need to remind myself that it will be OK if they don’t work out. My goal now is to “give-it-a-try”, not necessarily to find a new life passion. Learning just for the fun of it is goal enough.
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